Having Food Allergies as an Adult is Humbling
I have to sniff, prod and poke at any baked goods because people are so used to eating nuts in every culture. I can eat peanuts (kinda) but all other nuts are out of bounds for me.
I got some Hawai'ian cookies from a co-worker today, They have the smell of shortbread cookies, which to me smell vaguely like nuts.
I sniffed, scratched at the chocolate chips, and broke one part to make sure it had no nuts. It was safe.
It reminded me of the time I had a staff town hall luncheon at work. After we were served some bullshit-on-a-plate, I was just waiting for them to serve the dessert.
They had fancy dessert. Cheesecake.
Should be safe.
When I got up to get it, I don't recall seeing the "Contains: Nuts" symbol on the catering table. But I could have been distracted by the fact that cheesecake is one of the 7 wonders of the world.
I have to be very careful because my antihistamines (allergy medications) are not on me. My mistake, but I'm not used to eating outside of my office.
I picked the crust apart. I mean it's cheesecake, it's not really known to have nuts, but you have to be careful. I took a tiny crumb and tasted it. No distinct nut taste. Safe.
I plan on eating bit by bit, so I seem skinny around everyone. I am no glutton...
I ate a bite. Delicious. I dab my mouth with a napkin. I actually never do that, ever. I don't have class.
2 minutes later, my mouth is watering. Usually a sign I'm about to vomit, but it's also a sign that I'm having an allergic reaction.
I'm in the middle of a huge luncheon. There are speeches going on. I'm near the front. I could excuse myself but I'm also stubborn and think I'm made of nothing but GRIT™ so I feel like I can ride it out. Remember, deeply flawed.
Also if I do pass out in front of everyone, then I have an excuse to call off of work for a while! Excusing myself means they don't visually see that I'm sick, and therefore might think I'd come back the next day. I cannot emphasize enough how much I hate working.
Anyways, I'm sitting there, tongue getting itchy and I have to breathe through my mouth. I can't get enough air through my nose.
I only ate a bite, to seem skinny, remember? So the reaction isn't that big. But it's still my body attacking something I consumed.
My face is getting itchy.
Right now I'm thanking God for being dark brown because If I had whiter skin, my face would be red. Everyone would be going "Are you okay? :(", no thanks. My lips though, beet red and slightly swelling. They feel dry.
I chug water. Then, chug the diet coke I got earlier.
For some reason the coke helps me. It distracts my itchy face and throat since it's basically acid.
It subsides. I was half hoping I'd pass out. If I ate the whole thing, I probably would have.
Phew, crisis averted.
I continued eating the cheesecake, just around the crust this time. I space out the bites so if I do have a reaction again, I have time to calm it down between bites...
"Why, TC, Would you do that?"
I told you I'm deeply flawed. Please Let me eat my Cheesecake.
I love Cheesecake.
After the luncheon, I tell my boss that I think the cheesecake had nuts because I had a bit of a reaction. She looked at me worried and said I probably should avoid nuts if I'm allergic.
Did...did she think I was trying to kill myself? I'm 23, I know that.
It reminded me of this scene from one of my favorite shows, Archer Fx.
Pam is allergic to soy.
Oh well. The Cheesecake was so good. I'm glad I ate it. I don't even remember what the luncheon was about. It's so humbling that A Nut can bring a grown woman to her knees. ծ_Ô