i want to go to a furry convention
I'm not even a furry, yet I really wanted to go the the US Midwest Furfest. However, it's in December and I won't be in the US.
I've been saying I wanted to go for a while now, but I was a broke, jobless heathen until recently. My sisters think I'm joking.
I went to the Wisconsin Renaissance Fair last year for the first time. I've never dressed up in public like that before (I never did Halloween stuff.) The energy around people who will happily walk around town dressed like a viking or fairy or a goddam magical tree is so much fun. I can't go again this year because I'm leaving before we're able to go, but my sisters and I still plan to dress up and walk around town. That Faire is where my desire for a subculture/community began budding.
Furries are different because they often identify deeply with their community. Once Ren Fair or anime convention season is over, we get rid of those identities, for the most part. But furries have a community in which they can live 24/7 because its a subculture and a hobby, not just a hobby. It's too cool. And I miss being around cool people who dont care if they're into something (falsely) stigmatized. Especially fursuiters and the artists. I knew a few furries in high school, but that was years ago and I lost touch.
Taiwan has a furry convention in October of this year called Infurnity, and I will be living only an hour or two away from the convention site. However, despite being able to do most things alone without a care in the world, I don't think I can go to this alone without some sort of invite. I don't wanna feel like an uninvited guest or something, so I'll need to receive a large scroll in the mail or have a carrier Pidgeon sent to my door, or else I will feel like that loser standing in the corner of a party.
I'm used to standing out but I do worry that I'll be intruding. I think furries are one of the least judgmental subcultures to exist but my bodily instinct tells me I'm not welcome. WHICH IS WEIRD RIGHT? I mean, I went to a Renaissance fair...it was not even an event I thought i'd feel welcome at. In Ren Faire promo photos before 2020 they all just contained gorgeous ginger-haired women dressed in traditional German-adjacent clothing. (I love redheads btw). That was the image I had in my head and it felt weird to think about attending. But in reality it's more like being scared to walk into a barbecue hosted by your redneck neighbors, only to be stuffed with food because they love you and want you to enjoy yourself. I was overthinking it. And I'm doing it again. But this time, I don't have sisters to alleviate my overthinking.
I have until September to pre-register. I may chicken out but I also want to go just to see my sisters' disbelief when I send them pictures of myself in the middle of the convention hall. "I told you so!"
I just wanna get out of my own bubble. I wanna continue to do things that I usually don't.
"Nobody is forcing you to go if you feel uninvited," you may say. But I am forcing me, and I expect better from...myself.