what do you want to be when you grow up?
at this age, its more like "what are you planning to do?" or "What are you doing with that" as in my degree. That i got almost two years ago now.
I don't know!
I will never know.
I wanted to be a teacher, then a doctor, then I got older.
I wanted to be a forensic scientist. And deep down inside, I wish I took up chemistry. It was my favorite science class. It's too late. I cant afford another Bachelor's degree.
I wanted to be a professor, which means more schooling and more tuition to pay.
I wanted to be a librarian, then an archivist. There are ZERO openings for such jobs. Plus I need more school.
I wanted to be a video editor, but man, that's a hard one to break into.
I don't know what I want to be or what I will be. I'd be lying if I said it doesn't worry me. I've never had a consistent answer. It's not that I'm spoiled for choice, but it's more like there is no job for me. One that i'm qualified for, pays well and that I enjoy.
I have sucked it up. I've been at this job for almost 2 years. But man, I go home feeling like I'd rather be dead than continue this monotonous pattern. I will be breaking it soon. But what comes after that?
A professor in my department asked me that a couple weeks ago and it took everything in me to not just say "I don't know." She thinks it's juvenile to leave a job like this for an "I don't know"-future.
When i inevitably run out of money, I don't know what I'll do. I don't care either. I'd rather be happy now.